I was having one of those days.....you know, it's grey, raining, the dogs keep traipsing in and out bringing with them yet more samples of the sogginess that is the property, you just want five minutes to sit and read something of your own, have a cuppa, but the cherubs are having none of it, seem incapable of playing for a few minutes on their own without screams and tears emanating from the bedroom.....it's one of those times you question why you are a SAHM, 'Surely I should be making a wage and bringing more money into the household? Am I losing every intelligent brain cell I have?'
It's a tad early but, the crying is more than I can bear now, so I decide wee cherub is tired and needs to try to go for a snooze. Surprisingly after a feeble attempt at a refutation, wee cherub falls asleep to her beautiful Greta Bradman Forest of Dreams lullabies - this album has been wonderful for both cherubs, gorgeous to listen too, not stimulating but calming, I have to make sure I don't hang about too long or I would be out for the count too!
Toddler cherub has asked to watch a cartoon so I oblige....'gives me a few minutes to myself', I think. So I nip over to the computer with a cup of tea and check my emails. Now, I cannot for the life of me remember what got me there, but I ended up at a website that made me stop and take stock of what I was doing. Holstee, a design company run by young things that have a social and environmental conscience, have a manifesto that just makes you sit up and take notice......well done them!
So - I came away from the computer and asked toddler cherub to make that the last cartoon, she was reluctant until I said, 'Would you like to bake some cranberry cookies with momma?'
Well, she flew from the rug, switched the television off and squealed with delight, shot up onto a chair at the kitchen counter and was all smiles waiting for her apron to be put on.....
I looked at this bubbling bundle of excitement, my beautiful girl.
I kissed her forehead and put her apron on, it wasn't long before she had covered herself, the kitchen and the dogs in flour.......................perfect......................I just needed to make the change so that I was doing what I loved.
I know tiredness and frustration will get the better of me again, but I shall be getting a copy of these words to have in the kitchen to quickly shake me out of my self indulgence and remember just how lucky I am, life is short and I am living my dream..........................
